DIstraction

    I remember hearing somewhere that man represents order and woman chaos. It really feels that way when I am involved with girls and things are not working out. Perhaps it is because I can read the situation on another level, I see through the matrix, but it really bothers me when the girl is trying to play games.

And it's frustrating that things are not as easy when it comes to hooking up as it once was. Double that frustration with the fact that things are not moving forward as quickly as I want it to. It's like I'm obsessedd with business and girls right now and nothing is happening. At least with business I can see that it's moving forward, iniching closer and closer to inevitable turning point. But I suppose that is hard to see with girls, since in a way I am starting over each time with a new girl.

Today I saw Humza, airbnb guy with 500 units, saying in his story that who you marry is the most important thing, and that because he was married at a young age he was able to become a millionaire so young.

I wonder who I would marry if I were to marry a girl right now. I'd probably take my shot with Orsolya but I don't know. But then again, this may not be the case for me. Everyone is different I suppose.

I do think that having that sort of stability would be good for my mind and soul. 

Thinking about girls does pull me away from focusing on my business. It really takes away mental energy and time where I am spending it on thinking of how to sleep with the girl rather than building my business. And what is the return? Momentary sensual pleasure, at the risk of feeling terribly broken when things end. It's really a bad trade off.


It is indeed a terrible challenge. I seem to have the will, determination, smarts, and skills needed to build a great business. The trouble comes from my impulse and desires, momentary pleasure and short term trade offs. I need to look at the bigger picture, over the horizon. I need to build myself.

Instead of chasing butterflies, I need to make a beautiful garden to attract the butterflies.


I will focus on my business and myself from now on.









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